caution

I don't have much to say lately because I'm not sure how I feel about things. I fluctuate a lot, going from worried and upset to hopeful and calm. I got the job - along with a few insults at the hiring interview. I'm not sure how to handle the situation. A lot of it reminds me of past jobs where I was used, manipulated, and burned. I'm scared of the inside politics, the possibility of being abused, and the lack of a future or recognition. I know this is a temporary thing and not a career. It's going to be a lot of work, a long haul out there, and not much time to get my life in order in other ways, such as exercise and yoga or enough sleep.

I'm scared, again. When will I just be at peace?